“Today has been hard, really hard. I had to rush through my
morning because I slept in later than planned and then I walked into the office
to a bunch of voicemails to listen and respond to. Naturally, it was also the
day that I had a student in every lesson slot. But that all faded,
insignificant, when my first student arrived. A beautiful, spunky, handicapped,
and sometimes neglected child. My heart cracked. My coworker had a lesson
scheduled at the same time too. Only his student didn’t arrive. It hurts when
someone needs to be poured into, and Jesus’ love shared with them and the
opportunity to do so is taken away.
My student couldn’t even walk all the way to the boarding ramp;
it hurt for her to walk that far. So I asked her to sit and wait while I asked
Philip to bring the gator over. She sat perfectly content in the grass while
Philip drove the gator over and gave her a ride. Her smile was huge; she had
the time of her life. But my heart isn’t okay. I bravely walked along side her
and gave her a horse ride and loved her and was cheerful and chatted away but
I’m broken.
As I un-tacked the horse and she received yet another gator
ride the tears came and I cried out to God about this broken, sinned filled
world. Why does He put up with this? With them? With me? He sees this hurt
every moment. I only see it when I want to and still, I can’t handle it!
And in the middle of my tears and hurt and questions I
realized that God was giving me an opportunity and asking if I would be His
Hands and Feet. Not only on this day, in this moment, but every day. And as I
was about to surrender this life of mine to Him once again I realized that I’m
committing to more than I could ever possibly realize. Becoming His Hands and
Feet means ignoring flesh and fear of man and living fully in His Spirit. I
took a deep breath and acknowledged this. And I surrendered anyway. Because I
believe it will be completely worth it. It will be worth every time my heart
cracks and breaks. It will be worth it all. My Jesus needs to be shared with
this broken world.” ~ Lydia
“And if one person sees the love of Christ in me it is worth
every minute. In fact, it is worth spending my life for. “ Katie Davis Major
“I have learned that I will not change the world. Jesus will
do that. I can, however change the world for one person. So I keep stopping and
loving one person at a time. Because this is my call as a Christian.” Katie Davis Major
